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Dear Mom of Closely Spaced Siblings

Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.

I was in the checkout line at Joann’s and saw a mom with two small boys in front of me.  The boys looked close in age.  Being a mother of closely spaced siblings, I asked her how far apart they were.  They were 20 months.

Kate and Caroline are 14 months apart.  That means I was super pregnant when Kate had her 1st birthday party and she was barely over 1 when Caroline was born.  I know for a lot of people that’s not an ideal situation.  Essentially we had two babies but they were at different stages of life.  One was a recent walker and big talker and the other had jaundice and didn’t want to breastfeed.  They were both babies.

I told the woman that our girls were 14 months apart.  I mentioned that I LOVE the age gap.  She asked me if I was tired.  I think she wanted to ask me if I was crazy.

No.  No, I’m not tired (and I’m not crazy, either).  I’m at the point where I can finally breathe with them.  I can do something for myself and the two of them keep each other occupied.  Sometimes we go all day with them out of sight and playing with each other.  Yes, they fight.  They fight fiercely when they do, too.  For the most part, they are glued at the hip.  Neither one wants to do anything without the other.  They are currently working on beating the World Record for the most nights sleeping together.  {Their record is 6 so far.}

I thought of all the things I wanted to say to the mom.  Because I didn’t say them, I’ll write to moms of closely spaced siblings everywhere.

Dear mama of closely spaced siblings,

I know you are tired.  I know you feel like you are always changing a diaper, getting someone dressed, cooking, cleaning, and feeding someone.

That’s because you are.

Having babies at different stages is hard work.  Heck, having babies at the same stage is hard work.  But I promise it gets better.

I swear.

Before you know it, those kids aren’t going to want you to rock them at night.  They’re not going to want to hear a bedtime story because they are going to be so excited to read that they want to do it themselves.

The deafening sound of the chaos, which used to pierce your ears and give you a headache, is slowly going to get dimmer and dimmer.  Before you know it you are going to be in the sweet spot.

Embrace the chaos.

Embrace the mess.

The days of you questioning your sanity are going to feel like they last forever.  I can’t promise you there will be a time that you will miss it, but I can promise you that when you look back, it’s going to have passed quickly.

xoxo
–a mama who’s in the sweet spot
(With 2 kids at least! The 3rd one is getting there.)

Here are some photos that show the relationship that Kate and Caroline have:

Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
For a point of reference, this is what Kate looked like when we found out we were pregnant.  She was 6 months old.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
This was the day we came home from the hospital.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Some attempts at playing.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
More attempts at playing.  Caroline was not impressed.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Caroline worried about how scared Kate was of Santa.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Smoochies!
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
These two are always holding hands.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
The first time they held hands was on a walk after Kate’s first day of preschool.  She told Caroline all about it.  So glad I snapped a photo of it!
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Holding hands in line at Disney World.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Didn’t I tell you they are always holding hands?
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
They love to sleep together.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
Even when I am taking a picture of Rebecca, they are always hugging.
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.
I am so thankful for the love these two have for each other.

xoxo

–k

Click to read how connecting with your kid individually is important.  

Connecting with your kids only gets harder as they get older. Here are 3 ways to connect with your children individually.

Connecting with your kids only gets harder as they get older. Here are 3 ways to connect with your children individually.

Click here to read how to foster a strong sibling bond

5 ways to help siblings create a stronger relationship so their relationship thrives as they grow.

5 ways to help siblings create a stronger relationship so their relationship thrives as they grow.

Click here to read how to use Compliment Circles to build confidence and strong relationships within a family

Use Compliment Circles to build confidence and strong relationships within a family.

Use Compliment Circles to build confidence and strong relationships within a family.

Click the photo to save this pin for later!
Dear Mom of closely spaced siblings, you will survive. Closely spaced siblings are hard but their bond is incredible.

 

Filed Under: Children, connection, Family unit, parenting, Raising Siblings, Uncategorized Tagged With: Uncategorized

Kristina Grum is a Certified Parent Educator who has over a decade of experience working with children, including being a classroom teacher. She currently teaches parenting classes in her local area and writes about shifting parenthood from barely surviving to thriving.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Mrs. Darling says

    December 8, 2015 at 7:06 pm

    Thank you for this, especially the pictures. I have a large gap with my oldest and youngest. The next gap is going to be quite close and I'm feeling a bit nervous.

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Hi… I’m Kristina!

Kristina Grum is a Certified Parent Educator who has over a decade of experience working with children, including being a classroom teacher. She currently teaches parenting classes in her local area and writes about shifting parenthood from barely surviving to thriving. Read More…

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